I started saying this at Glowing Goddess Getaway events when I would be stationed at the Glow Bar helping goddesses decide how they wanted to consume cannabis. Being a loud gal, I hollered out "Are you as high as you want to be?" as an enthusiastic way to remind folks they came to unwind.
But it's also a good reminder for yourself to actually set an intention for how high you want to be BEFORE you consume. You can always get more high, it's really hard to get less high!
The three main resources all of us have available to us are our time, treasure and talent.
Much like our beloved mushroom friends function as an underground network of mycelium, I try to move my resources and nutrients very intentionally between places that matter to me.
I think going into family gatherings with a list of compromise, fairly neutral media to screen together is a good idea. (My family loved to go to the movies together on visits.)*
I find it easiest to deal with folks like that to focus on what we have in common. I think this documentary could create some family harmony for potentially up to 1 hour and 47 minutes.
My intention with this piece is to teach anyone who is trepidatious about going to a gathering some of my favorite tools for hard conversations and difficult people. I've been working on healing from social anxiety intentionally for nearly five years and I've learned a lot about how to release defensiveness and needing to be "right" which helps a lot with harmonizing conversations.
It can be so hard to know how to deal with death and kids in a society that is pathologically afraid of genuine feelings, especially the sad and hard feelings. But the basics are--let's teach kids how to feel bravely so they can grow up and not have to reparent themselves like the rest of us have had to.
American democracy is getting it wrong. It represents corporations and highest bidders, ignores the will of the people.
I've been brewing my own ideas about a new form of government and I am going to dream out loud with y'all.
Six years ago if you'd asked me about attending weekly Sunday services I would have said, "Unlikely!" Now I got to two different church services on Sundays! Rest assured I only attend services where all seekers are welcomed and valued.
I am really obsessed with making milkshake drinks out of frozen bananas and so proud of myself about figuring out a good pumpkin pie flavor profile.
Our consumer power is the most important. We all have time, attention and money to spend--curating how you do that with folks who align with your values is how we will create the world of our dreams instead of investing in this murderous paradigm.
It’s 4/20 somewhere and this weekend we are having it on a Saturday! I wanted to share with you a wise question to ask that is both FUN life of the party vibes AND a good reminder to check in with yourself and regulate your consumption!
I’m posting this on 4/19, Bicycle Day, and this question is as much for psychedelics as for cannabis!
I started saying this at Glowing Goddess Getaway events when I would be stationed at the Glow Bar helping goddesses decide how they wanted to consume cannabis. Being a loud gal, I hollered out “Are you as high as you want to be?” as an enthusiastic way to remind folks they came to unwind.
But it’s also a good reminder for yourself to actually set an intention for how high you want to be BEFORE you consume. You can always get more high, it’s really hard to get less high!
I have been a “more is more” consumer, and as someone with an addictive personality I am always checking in with my relationship with cannabis as medicine and as stress relief. Sometimes it makes me more anxious than I want to be! Sometimes I can’t afford to be incapacitated, or I have responsibilities that need my attention (either later that day or the next day when I don’t want to be hazy).
What’s magical about setting aside time for relaxation and celebration is getting to be in a safe environment and let plant medicine mellow you out and inspire revelations.
I like shouting “Are you as high as you wanna be?!” to raise the vibe on a celebration. I like asking it peacefully as I pass someone a joint and ask if they want it. It’s charming and a good question.
If you do get more high than you want to be here are my tips:
*EAT. Drink water. Eat some more. It helps metabolize the cannabis.
*LAY DOWN: Go find your bed and get under the covers hopefully it’s really nearby. (My fav part of camping with friends is my bed is really nearby and I can nap and come back to the gathering.)
*BREATHE: Soothing breaths are in through the nose filling the belly and a longer exhale through the mouth. Three breaths like this are something I use all the time.
*Charcoal pills! These are great to have on hand! Activated charcoal is useful for so many natural remedies and helping you digest cannabis is one of them! Here’s a link to one brand, if you buy anything from Amazon after using my link (not just what I link to) I get a 3% bonus from Amazon’s profits. Of course I hope you shop small and local first but if you were gonna support Amazon anyway, thanks for using my link!
I’ve been smoking way less the last six months because it turns out smoking hurts my throat and I want to be able to teach aerobics for the rest of my life! But I still love the medicine and use non psychoactive ingestion to prevent Covid-19 and other harm reduced ways of consuming.
Sitting by a fire with friends, enjoying a joint and looking at the hummingbirds is a deep occasional pleasure for me and I hope you get out and enjoy nature and cannabis together if you can!
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“I love America more than any other country in this world, and, exactly for this reason, I insist on the right to criticize her perpetually.”–James Baldwin
American democracy is getting it wrong. It represents corporations and highest bidders, ignores the will of the people. I’m writing a series of Federalist Papers to share how I hope we can shift things to create the world of our dreams.
This is the way I choose to see my own participation in economy in order to make change in the world.
The three main resources all of us have available to us are our time, treasure and talent.
Much like our beloved mushroom friends function as an underground network of mycelium, I try to move my resources and nutrients very intentionally between places that matter to me.
The mushrooms, by the way, are the fruit of the mycelium, and are typically less than 20% of the overall mycelium. It’s incredible the way they communicate with one another and act as a conduit of nutrients and information between trees!
I really think mushrooms are teachers for us showing us the way we can heal the planet from extracting corporate oligarchs!
When I spend money I prioritize first putting money in the hands of another person I know, I’m in community with or that I value.
I do this because the “nutrients” from the money I use are far more impactful the more locally I can spend the money.
I still consider money “local” if it’s within a community I’m part of, even if that community is worldwide as many of my communities are in these internet Age of Aquarius times!
When a community gathers around common values this as a mindful way to spend money. Plus, I want my communities to thrive and when I spend money with vendors within the community I’m voting for them to win.
In some ways intra community spending feels like we pass “the same $20” around but it’s actually pretty powerful and I hope it will eventually be the “same $1,000” we pass around.
My second priority is putting the money in the hands of another individual or family. It feels great that the money I spend at a family owned restaurant is going right to keeping the lights on at the house of the family who owns it.
Or having a hair dresser who is independent versus working for a big corporation where they are just getting paid hourly.
I spend with cash when I am able because credit card processing is expensive for small businesses and puts some of the transaction money into the hands of corporations. No thanks!
I then prioritize local worker-owned businesses (some of these are not family owned). In Port Townsend we have a worker-owned food co-op and I do 75% of my grocery shopping there. The other 25% is at a local family owned franchise of Grocery Outlet (wow do I love discount snacks).
I learned that the cure for our current “greedflation” we are experiencing with groceries is prioritizing spending grocery money with stores that are on the same supply chain as Grocery Outlet, Dollar Stores, Trader Joe’s, etc… We speak to corporations with our money and when we prioritize spending with the companies that are not price gauging it’s very loud to them!
Next I’m going to prioritize shopping at a privately held corporation. (You’d need to do some research to figure out whether a company is traded on a stock market or is privately held, but it’s pretty easy to figure out.) I also take a look at the values that the corporation walks out.
For example, I’ve never eating at chik-fil-a because they support gay hating initiatives that really don’t align with their stated values. But they are privately held and will continue to be. (I truly don’t understand Christian hegemony that doesn’t align with the teachings of Jesus the Christ but that’s a different article for a different day!)
Why private companies? Because I don’t want to make faceless shareholders wealthy with my money. The more we divest from big corporations the more power our money has. The more we empower people in our communities with our money the better we support the folks we want to win!
I also think about hedge fund bros making millions off of moving money around. Money is really just an idea (read the Soul of Money–life changing).
If I had $20 to spend on a meal out I’d rather give that money to a mom and pop mexican place than Chipotle (owned in part by McDonald’s corporation, currently subject to boycott).
Before I’ll shop at Amazon I’ll shop at a big box store that has a local store that employs my neighbors. The goal is to keep the money circulating locally as much as possible.
Amazon, by the way, is not a great place for their workers, not actually creating happiness or smiles even though they have the resources to do it! (I kind of see the vans they have as Death Eaters with their smoke steaming around my neighborhood a la Harry Potter movies).
I have a friend who prioritizes shopping from Amazon online because they are the only company using electric vehicles around here, which is a fair point. Everyone has different values that matter to them!
I also post links to Amazon from time to time on my blog (and include a link in every blog post so if you ARE shopping from Amazon I get a 3% commission at no cost to you that cuts into Bezos’ profits). I do this because it’s a great way for me to not have to give cash to Amazon when I do because they pay me in gift cards. I would much rather you support an indie bookseller but if you’re gonna use Amazon, I appreciate the circulation of energy coming my way!
A reminder to tip lavishly in cash whenever you are able to and always when receiving a service not from the owner of the business!
You can apply the same kind of prioritization to your time (which is also your attention). There’s a reason all these apps and streaming services are vying for your attention. It’s a commodity to them!
Your talent are the things you’re good at. Consider who you could be helping with what you’re good at. Something that is very simple to you is very meaningful to someone else!
We are systematically disempowered in our society. Whenever I feel bad about myself I consider “who profits off my self loathing” and choose new thoughts.
We think we can’t fix the big problems ourselves so we don’t do these small things that actually help.
The big changes that come from below are because lots of people are making little decisions to help a bigger issue. Most people just give up rather than try, but we make big changes by each of us being willing to be a little uncomfortable or inconvenienced to make a difference.
The current boycott of Starbucks has reduced their company’s net worth by $4 Billion and counting. That’s a bunch of people deciding collectively to simply change their coffee shop. Small decisions by a lot of people make a huge impact.
This soap box moment isn’t to say you have to do things my way or you’re a bad person. I don’t think that at all–I believe everyone is doing the best they can with the tools they have at the time. My point in this article is to help you understand the way I think about resources in hopes that you will take what you like and leave the rest.
I try to be a river not a reservoir in life and get intentional about where I flow my resources. Yeah, it’s more of a hassle to figure out where to get my audiobooks since Amazon gobbled up audible. It’s more of a hassle to shop locally than buy from Bezos. But I want to make a difference in my tiny corner of the world, and support my communities. That matters more to me than a small inconvenience.
Further reading: What if Tipping Revolutionized the World?
Follow Focused on Infinity on Instagram, and Patreon for further tips on prepping and mobilizing in these times. I’m really appreciating Logan’s leadership and empowerment in these continually unprecedented times.
P.S. This post is an adaptation of an article published in issue 2 of the Goddess Quarterly, a zine for Goddesses who heal with plant medicine.
If you find value in this blog, please consider supporting! It costs hundreds per year to maintain the archives and I want it to be a resource for anyone who needs it!
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It’s on Netflix!
There are times when our life circumstances end up with us hanging out with people who have very different views about the world.
I think going into family gatherings with a list of compromise, fairly neutral media to screen together is a good idea. (My family loved to go to the movies together on visits.)*
I find it easiest to deal with folks like that to focus on what we have in common. I think this documentary could create some family harmony for potentially up to 1 hour and 47 minutes.
Okay so first of all a lot of people love Tanya Tucker across the political spectrum. Brandi Marie Carlile herself says we (meaning everyone) are more alike than we are different.
A return story (don’t call it a comeback) is heart warming. Tanya is SO. VULNERABLE. Relatable! It’s hard to have been knocked on your ass and made mistakes and she has been so famous since she was a lil nugget 13 year old.
Pause and remember HOW YOUNG thirteen is!?
She chose Delta Dawn, by the way, as a nugget. That’s so boss.
Back in the day when the Gen X/Boomers/etc were younger there was way less media so Tanya being so famous so long ago means your older family members and people you know are likely to know Tanya and have some level of affection for her. Suggest this movie!
I cried 20 minutes into the movie and kept crying many more times. I can feal that vulnerability and dear lord, how relatable to take creative risks later in life.
I am a 2023 Brandi Carlile fan and the more I know her the more I like her.
Watching her produce someone she admired very much was brilliant! She is so tender and tough and has a clear vision. Brandi has Mercury in Cancer and the way she encourages Tanya is in this nurturing mommy boss very Cancer way. Tanya gets nervous about a minor part in the final mix and wants to change something, Brandi explains calmly what that might take away from the project and encourages Tanya just to take the vulnerability risk!
The album they make on the documentary, While I’m Livin’, is absolutely fantastic!! A great listen! Playing cards with the family? Listen to Tanya’s two recent albums!
The song Bring My Flowers Now is so moving and I gasped when I realized the documentary was showing us the moment Tanya speaks those words as a song idea and Brandi takes up the pen and makes it happen.
It might be my favorite song ever. Once you realize how frequently your friends become ancestors you want to be giving flowers while you’re alive. At least I do. I’ve learned all too well there will be a time you can’t hug someone you love or admire and I want as many hugs and heart connections as I can before I depart this plane. (And I still want those heart connections then, too. But the hugs are an earthside thing!)
OMG the things Tanya says! She is my favorite kind of person–brutally honest. Brandi asks her about Miranda Lambert and she says “Oh she’s my pick of the litter!”
Wow. Like that’s really a compliment coming from Tanya and you can tell by the tone of her voice but it’s so specific.
Anyway, I meant to post this documentary / Netflix recommendation during the holidays back when I posted about ways to handle your tough family conversations and I think this review and that survival guide are a good pair.
P.S. Just cuz you’re visiting family or friends or community doesn’t mean you need to stay with them. Consider the mental health benefits of (if you can) renting a place with a bathtub for a salt bath and some meditation/spiritual hygiene time. Or taking up a friend on their alternate place to stay!
(When I was easing out of no contact with my mom I stayed across the Bay from her in the redwoods with my bestie and drove an hour to visit with her when I needed to visit. Or with my friends in SF who had a really nice tub and cozy guest bed!)
If you can’t get a separate place advocate for your self care time and space! Taking a walk and putting your feet in the grass. There are sometimes hotels with hospital discounts if you’re visiting someone in a hospital!
*I have a BIG BOUNDARY about having the TV news on no matter what the genre of the mass media. It’s not how I want my ear space occupied. If my Grandmother were alive now we would have intentional old movies playing 24/7 because she used to play the news 24/7 very loud in her house to ease her anxiety. I would want to be a partner with her to ease her anxiety with noise it would just need to be something I found soothing, too.
Grandmother had a huge bath tub in her guest suite and I kept epsom salts there for my visits. I miss her hugs and getting to stay with her in Palm Springs! I would have shown her this Tanya Brandi documentary after showing her how to use Netflix on a streaming device for the infinite time.
If you find value in this blog, please consider supporting!
Patreon.com/fkdp (you can follow for free and get updates and freebies from me! I can draw a direct line to the art I am creating today and the Patreon support I have received over the past five years.)
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Venmo: @bevinb
Cash App: $BevinBoss
Amazon Wishlist (Buy me a treat or a tool!): https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/1SJCL864DDKEH?ref_=wl_share
Buy anything on Amazon using this link to go to their website and I make a 3% commission on anything you buy! Costs nothing extra to you and cuts into that “astronaut’s” profits just a lil bit. https://amzn.to/2PQ52A9
Tee shirts: https://genuinevalentine.com/collections/fat-kid-dance-party
Buy my aerobics video! fatkiddanceparty.com/video4pack
Instagram: @fatkiddanceparty @bevinsparty
Podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/bevin (Search “Bevin” on Spotify or Apple/Google Podcasts)
You Tube Channel:
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Email list: http://eepurl.com/dyX3db
Threads, Tik Tok, Twitter: @bevinsparty
Facebook.com/bevinsparty
Like/subscribe/review/send a link to a friend! It all helps!